Friday, October 4, 2013

Mommygraphs


Once upon a time I went to college. I learned a lot of stuff. I created complicated graphs on the computer, participated in intellectual discussions about the universe and read really, really thick books written by people who died a long, long time ago. I don't do those things anymore.

They say that having children kills brain cells and it must be true because today, while my kids were coloring, I asked someone to pass me "that thing with the cap on it that writes." You know, a marker. 

I wondered what kind of information overload was happening in my brain to cause me to forget the word "marker." So I decided to dust off my old collegiate knowledge and put it to good use.

While my kids did their coloring, I made a graph.
No, my percentages do not add up to 100.
Obviously all this Mommy knowledge leaves no room for mathematical computations. Duh. 

That was fun. I made some more.


When this occurs, you have two options:
1. Endure an epic meltdown
2. Send your child to school with remnants of last night's dinner on his shirt
(I have done both.)


I saw a little wall hanging like this at a boutique once,
except that one was about dogs. I like it better with kids.

Well, I guess that degree was worth it after all. 

Of course, if I were in college all these graphs would be perfectly typed and neatly arranged with the use of some high-tech computer program. But today I'll have to settle for the backside of a preschool newsletter and some "things with caps on them that write."

If you like these, check out Mommygraphs Part 2

Embrace life's little messes by following along on my new Facebook page!

19 comments:

  1. Haha. yes I can relate. To all of the above, and to your sentiments about your college education. I even used that last one to illustrate my blog today :)

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  2. I am really loving your blog! I found you by way of the Momastery site, and I've read several of your posts. Love it, and I can totally relate! (Especially the outfits for the 4 year old. SERIOUSLY.)

    Thanks!

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    1. Thanks Emily! And your blog is SO interesting, by the way! It's hard enough raising small children at home, much less in a foreign country!

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  3. LOVE IT! I can relate -- mealtimes are such a pain at my house too!

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    1. I BET IT IS--- ESPECIALLY ALONE ;)

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  4. Found you on HuffPost Parents today! Loving your blog!

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  5. This made me laugh out loud! Are you videotaping my life?!?!?

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  6. I was a firm believer in "You eat what I cook or go hungry". Now its more like "Fine you can have hotdogs, but only because the dogs don't need steak".

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  7. im not alone!!! its not just my kids!!!

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  8. I absolutely adore these graphs! I actually love them so much I was wondering if it is ok to use the "pick 2" in a blog I recently wrote for a mommy's blog community I'm a part of. I would of course source your blog as well! Is that ok? Thanks for the great read!

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  9. Blues clues?? Is this from 1998?! Really??

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  10. Am I the only one who thinks this is demeaning to moms? You can't do simple math because of your mommy brain? I would love to see a post giving girls something to aspire to instead of another knock on women's math abilities.

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    1. Not a working Mommy's brain for sure. Some of us are actually productive members of society and don't have the luxury of sitting at home doodling on papers all afternoon. God stay-at-home moms are so whiny.

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    2. Who's whining now? Geez. Move along. Bitter much?

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    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    4. Why is being a mom not something to aspire to?? What is wrong about being a mom?? Math problems?? We have plenty calculators, excel sheets, computers to do that. Guess what a computer can"t do?? RAISE CHILDREN!!

      Oh and Anonymous, while you are producing money, moms produce emotionally and phisically healthy human beings.

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  11. Found you on Huffpost! I TOTALLY relate and love your sense of humor! Don't worry about the haters^^ Working mom may not have time to doodle, but she sure has time to TROLL!

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  12. I love this! It's so true, I feel like pregnancy brain has lasted well beyond having my children. I love the creativity! :) I have a son who is a Type 1 Diabetic, he is 2.5 and calculating his insulin needs can be very difficult at times when I am having constant brain inactivity. :)

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